i've heard that over the course of our lives, we're going to meet ppl that change not only our character, but also the way we view the world and our role in it.
it's funny how much shit can happen in two years. funny too how sum days it can feel like it just happened yesterday and others it feels like it happened a lifetime ago. two years ago, this coming march, i lost two of the most important ppl in my life. my rich and my bestie joey. thankfully i got my bestie back. but my rich...no matter how much i wish otherwise, i'll never get him back.
he was the strongest, kindest and most loyal person ive ever met and i loved him completely. he was the kind of person that everyone was just drawn to. he had charisma, a crazy sense of humor and a mouth that, more often than not, got him into trouble. my rich loved to work on cars and race them. that was his passion. he use to joke that if he could get the same pleasure from his car that he did from a woman, he'd be single for the rest of his life. he was extremely easy to talk to and to confide in. it didnt matter what u were going thru, he understood EXACTLY how you felt and he did his damnedest to help you if he could. he was a fierce, fierce friend, brother, son, uncle and boyfriend. he inspired love and loyalty becuz he had so much of both. respect was paramount in his life. he gave it when it was given to him and didnt waste his time on ppl who didnt respect him. thats something he taught me; to get respect uve got to give respect.
Rich was my guardian angel, my soldier, my warrior. he saved me from myself countless times. but i wasn't the only one. anyone who was lucky enough to call him a friend had his unshakeable loyalty and his always ready fists. if someone he loved was getting hurt or pushed around, even if they were doing it to themselves like i was, he was always there to put a stop to it. impossible wasnt a word he knew. it just didnt exist for him. he made me see that the world didnt have to be the dark place i thought it was. if i wanted it enough and if i had the strength, courage and determination to change it, i could. he was my love and he will always have a place in my heart. he taught me that even if i couldnt love with permance, i should always love with care and respect. that was probably the most important lesson he taught me.
he had such an impact on my life. i dont take people i love for granted anymore. i give everything i have to someone i love.
two years ago this march, i lost this extrordainary young man. he was only seventeen. even though the pain of this is starting to fade and i'm starting to heal, his memory will never fade. he was a strong, brave, loyal, loving person and my tribute to him will be to always try to live the way he did: fearlessly, loyally but most of all respectfully and lovingly.
i know i'll never really be able to understand why he was taken, not only from me but from everyone who loved him. but i'm finally understanding that life just doesnt stop when you lose someone. my life hasnt stopped and time does go on. i have an amazing boyfriend whom i love wit all my heart. i have amazing friends, a loving family and a very bright future that almost didnt happen.
when i lost him i thought my whole reason for existence was gone, but that wasnt the case. my rich has left his footprint on my heart and there itll stay. i'm moving on and i'm finally starting to heal. thank god
