It's taken a lifetime to lose my way
A lifetime of yesterdays
All the wasted time on my hands turns to sand
And fades in the wind
Crossing lines, small crimes
Taking back what is mine
I'm fine in the fire
I feed on the friction
I'm right where I should be
Don't try and fix me
I'm fine in the fire
I feed on the friction
I'm right where I should be
Don't try and fix me
So lost for so long to find to my way
I failed to follow, I'm out of place
Crossing lines, small crimes
Taking back what is mine
I will hold my head up high
You will never see me cry
I’ll smile and say I’m good
But I will fall apart if I could
I’m inside out shot through the center
Feel this scar of where you entered
Took my life and turned it upside down
I’m burned to ashes split down the middle
If anyone asks it hurt just a little
I died inside the day I let you go
But I will never let you know
All this time the sky was a liar
They say that the moon don’t shine
It’s just the light from a star
Well maybe that’s the way we are
I’m inside out shot through the center
Feel this scar of where you entered
Took my life and turned it upside down
I’m burned to ashes split down the middle
If anyone asks it hurt just a little
I died inside the day I let you go
But I will never let you know
I’m burned to ashes split down the middle
And if anyone asks it hurt just a little
I died inside the day I let you go
But I don’t want to let you know
I cannot forget you
I will never let you know
He's right and I'm wrong
This love is good as gone
He's pushing, I'm pulling
Who did I think I was fooling?
He's rockin', I'm rollin'
He's beautiful and I'm broken
I should've known better
Thinking this could last forever
Giving up, giving in
Let's call it out for what it is
Should've known where this was going
He's rockin', I'm rollin'
He's careful and I'm reckless
Don't know what we expected
Both young and, so stupid
Let's blame it all on cupid
He's rockin', I'm rollin'
You've been searching
Have you found many things?
Time for learning
Why have I not learnt a thing?
Words with no meaning
Have kept me dreaming
But they don't tell me anything
All you never say is that you love me so
All I'll never know is if you want me oh
If only I could look into your mind
Maybe then I'd find a sign
Of all I want to hear you say to me
Are you uncertain?
Or just scared to drop your guard?
Have you been broken?
Are you afraid to show your heart?
Life can be unkind
But only sometimes
You're giving up before you start
All you never say is that you love me so
All I'll never know is if you want me oh
If only I could look into your mind
Maybe then I'd find a sign
Of all I want to hear you say to me
To me
All you never say is that you love me so
All I'll never know is if you want me oh
If only I could look into your mind
Maybe then I'd find a sign
Of all I want to hear you say to me
To me
"Love Is My Disease"
this sky goes on forever tonight
and this misery has taken on a life
and it loves the company
its become the misery of me
the hole in black clouds
shines light on a place unknown
and your fingers digging in these wounds
are scraping away my sanity
it takes ahold of me
the winds sadness pushes me away
and its become all i see
its all i breathe
i float above the sky
the stars fall to the ground
and everything i know just crashes down
i try to scream but there is no sound
cuz this misery in me
loves the comfort in you
and i'd never thought i'd see
a sky so void of everything
you put your walls up
to block out the world
you were so afraid
when i put my hands up
and knocked them all down
i am the holes in your walls
that you look through
when you're feeling not so scared
why are you so petrified
of the world outside
i wandered away from you for awhile
i come back again
and i cant see you anymore
my strength has dwindled
i cant push down your walls any longer
i cry out
i hate you
stupid fucking sky
the wind laughs at me
leaves fall and
cut my skin
and my blood soaks
into the ground
i fall for your apathy
every time
i keep running back to this
i swear i'm not addicted
it hurts to be without this pain
i crawl inside myself
and wait for you
you have scraped out my heart
til there is nothing left of me
i'm empty
and i hate you
dont break me dont you fucking break me
i never wanted you
everything you say
everything you do
all of it lacks emotion
my heart is broken
and it will break a million times over
for every moment you look away
i hate you
i hate you
an angel cries
as she sits
on the mountain of faces
bleeding
corrupted youth
brainwashed at birth
the angel
so perfect
cries for you
cries for me
and now
she will die for us
taking the drugs
we prescribed her
to help ease her pain
an angel
looks over a sea of faces
looking for the hate
thats born inside of you
that feeds off you
that eats away at your soul
til you're just like her
filling the emptiness up
with drugs
that we prescribe for you
to help ease your pain
you sit...
on a mountain of faces
bleeding
corrupted youth..
i lay here awake
as you sleep thousands of miles away
i bring this cigarette to my lips
and my hand shakes
i watch as the light and smoke
engage in a silent intimate dance
the smoke swirls around me
and i'm pulled into a world
a dream world in my mind
i smile as i think of you
and all the things you do that make my soul dance
dance with the smoke and the light
making a whirlwind of perfection
in an instant the cigarette is out with a protesting sizzle
as i drop it into the make-shift ashtray-a can of old pepsi
i switch off the light
and i'm pulled into the dark
dark where you are not
this is my favorite time of the night
when i can close my eyes and dream
to make you real
make you real..