You might be a redneck if 61
You might be a reneck if...
You buy the lot next to your house because you need the room for all your "stuff" (cars, trucks building materials).
Your idea of new siding on the house is more tar paper.
The oak tree in the front yard is an essential piece of automotive repair equipment (how else are you gonna pull the engine out of the old Dodge?)
Instead of locking the doors of your house, you keep a shotgun within reach, "just in case".
You consider pickled deer organs a delicacy.
You don't know what a redneck is.
You're still upset that they canceled "The Dukes of Hazzard".
You thought ER was ET's cousin.
You think a strip joint is where they disassemble cars.
You are in 6 grade and the only one in your family that can write your name.
You might be a redneck if 62
You might be a reneck if...
You've ever been stuck in your own driveway.
You refer to your dog as the dishwasher.
Your car is made out of 17 others and each part is a different color.
You repair your car in the autoparts store parking lot.
You can name all the characters from the "Dukes of Hazzard".
You recite lines from "The Dukes of Hazzard".
You keep track of all the belt holders in all the wrestling leagues.
You got married in the family car, in a drive-thru chapel.
You search your computer monitor for the dial that changes channels.
Your idea of a fancy dessert is "moon pie ala mode".
You might be a redneck if 63
You might be a reneck if...
You just bought your family their lst Atari game system.
You and your wife celebrate your anniversay at the K-mart cafeteria.
You think the only tools "real men" need are duck tape and caulk, and you have sucessful repair projects to prove it.
You've tried to quote Jeff Foxworthy and screwed it up.
You name your car the General Lee.
You see a sign that says "bridge out" and you try to jump it.
You go to your local pet shop for a cat scan.
Warp drive describes the condition of your car.
Your smoke detector doubles as your dinner bell.
You go to the dentist for a "Tooth Cleaning".
You might be a redneck if 64
You might be a reneck if...
You pull up to a gas station in a limo to buy a can of Skoal.
Your boyfriend gives you car parts for your birthday, and you like it.
Coons get into everyone else's trash but yours.
When you say, "Let's hit the hay," you actually MEAN it.
You can feed a family of five on ONE McDonald's Extra Value Meal.
Your kids LIKE the Arch Deluxe hamburger at McDonalds.
You think the tobacco companies have done nothing wrong.
You *have* a clawfoot bathtub.
You've ever been arrested for bootleggin'.
You spell out NASCAR in Christmas lights.
You might be a redneck if 65
You might be a reneck if...
Your idea of good fishing involves the use of a boat, a net and dynamite.
Burger King won't let you do it your way, right away.
You can remember the entire NASCAR series schedule but can't remember your wifes birthday, kids birthday, or anniversary.
You can remember every NASCAR driver and their car number but can't remember how old your children are.
Your idea of going to see a play involves goal posts.
You think a computer hacker carries an axe.
You keep a chainsaw in the trunk "just in case".
You've given your gun a woman's name.
Baling wire and a pair of pliers are what you consider high tech tools.
You go to the post office to research your family tree.
