A work by Bryant McGill, for more visit him at:
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A Gift Giver's Manifesto
Category: Writing and Poetry
From a Self Portrait (2006)
If you want to be successful at anything you do, it will help you to first be a successful human. That's right; a successful human. And just what is that? I believe that since human life is a social life, becoming a successful human means being there for other people, which is why I have always believed that no time is better spent than that spent in the service of your fellow man. Further, success does not mean happiness, success means doing the right thing. The rewards of doing the right thing are usually much deeper and painful. The greatest happiness comes from feeling and expressing our love for other people, and particularly our families. If you think about it, we love most those who we serve most, whether it be children, employees, friends or our communities. And this means that we can bring about a greater love for one another, though a life of simple, but meaningful service, and this is precisely what being a Gift Giver will do for those we can educate about the unlimited potentials for success through service.
When John Donne contemplated the indelible inter-connectedness of humanity in Meditation XVII, saying that, "No man is an island," he was speaking to you and me. Irrespective of Ayn Rand's eminent and highly influential tributes to individualism, and the power of self-determination through her unforgettable Randian heroes, John Donne's grounding toll to reason struck a long lasting chord in us all when he wrote, "All mankind is of one author, and is one volume...As therefore the bell that rings to a sermon, calls not upon the preacher only, but upon the congregation to come: so this bell calls us all: but how much more me, who am brought so near the door by this sickness....No man is an island, entire of itself...any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind; and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee."
Donne's bell is tolling for us all right now. When we fail our friends and neighbors, and even the stranger down the way, through our vanity, selfishness, greed, envy, fear, indifference, or complacency; when we fail to even know about, or acknowledge someones suffering, which is in obvious sight, much less attempt to ease it, the world is truly made a darker place, and Donne's bell tolls louder, while something dies in us all. The failure of that individual to act represents an atomic failure of humanity itself. The world markets of optimism and hope can plummet, because of the actions or inactions of a single person. Russell Crowe's character Maximus said in Gladiator, "What we do in this life, Echoes into Eternity." Clearly what we do not do can have the same effect. The upside to this, and there is always an upside, is that the good works of even one person can represent the whole of humanity's triumph through that sole heroic act. One person really can make a difference, and a difference that can seismically move through the masses, transforming an entire ethos practically overnight; a cultural and emotional butterfly effect if you like. Look at the enormous impact Gandhi had on two violently clashing countries with his simple, and frail embodied spiritual exercises of selflessness, loving other people and valuing human life. And that was even without the power of media to move his ideas around quickly. One person can make a difference, and you need not look to icons like Gandhi to find people making a difference.
Above, I mentioned the world markets of optimism and hope. There are many types of currency, not the least of which is a system of emotional and trust economics that govern societies, both primitive and modern. These economics govern every relationship, whether it be between individuals, or nations. In fact, money as we know it does not really exist. Think about it. Money is just a piece of paper, and outside of our dynamic and collective consent it has no value beyond the value of the paper it is printed on. The only reason money has value is because we all agree that it does. So ironically, money can be seen as a placeholder for of all things -- trust. Humorously, while still accurate, you could say "In God We Trust," is printed on our money, because you hope to God that when you go to redeem that worthless piece of paper (or its digital representation in an account) that the recipient will honor its value with real world goods and services at a fair exchange. The key point here is there is more trust in the world that we may think, even during our most cynical hours. When you fully accept that money is a placeholder for trust, you must realize also, that there is a lot of trust in the world, and this offers us something to build on. In a relationship, when trust is lost, everything is lost. We can become emotionally bankrupt, or even in debt. To make money one must spend money. And this is why it is important that we invest in people, whose personal accounts of hope and optimism are low.
From the same painting...
There are so many people in need, who quietly are hovering near the abysmal edges of emotional bankruptcy. Life is dynamic, and it can be ugly. Thomas Hobbes said in Leviathan that life was, "...solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short." And, Henry David Thoreau wrote in Walden that, "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation." I must sadly admit that this seems to be the case for too many people. This is one of the reasons I believe too many people anesthetize themselves with a never-ending, glutinous consumption of mass entertainment, television and fruitless consumerism. Most people do not do these things because they're living life, they do these things because they're hiding from life. If you are lonely when you are alone, you are in poor company, and many people are poor in the deepest and most internal sense. They will do anything to avoid being left alone with their thoughts; being left alone to Thoreau's quiet desperation, or worn down by the unforgiving and brutish world spoke of by Hobbes. They are teetering on emotional bankruptcy, and though they do not realize it, they are living with the haunting, but quiet realization that they are not answering the calls for help from their fellow man. They have a nagging feeling that they have not yet experienced all of what life has to offer. They want more in their relationships; more money and more success. They try to force these things, and when they do not materialize, they become negative and pessimistic. The harder they try, the further away the things they want seem to move. They do not realize that all things come through other people. It is counterintuitive for them to hear that you get most things in life you want not by taking them, but by giving. Giving is the key to all success in all applications of human life. Giving is not a physical action; giving is a philosophy, and a way of living life. There are endless opportunities to give the smallest things that cost us nothing, but mean the world to other people. Money and time are not the only things we can give. We can give others appreciation, patience, compassion, courtesy, kindness, dependability, friendship, forgiveness, gratitude, honesty, loyalty, respect, tolerance and of course love.
For example let's look at just one of these; courtesy. Courtesy is a powerful and amazing gift to give. Courtesy is a silver lining around the dark clouds of civilization; it is the best part of refinement and in many ways, an art of heroic beauty in the vast gallery of man's cruelty and baseness. Good manners are appreciated as much as bad manners are abhorred, and a polite enemy is just as difficult to discredit, as a rude friend is to protect. Mastering courtesy alone will enhance your life and the lives of others. We can give a tired clerk a kind and understanding glance. We can give a frustrated driver a spot in line on the road. We can give a hopeful passerby a kind smile and wave. We can speak to people at all stations of life with respectful and polite words and tones. We can wait with one item in the grocery line behind someone with a full cart with a gentle smile, and body language that makes their day better. When we want to talk, we can instead listen, and let our attentiveness to another's need to speak be our silent statement. All of these simple, but powerful gifts have immense value to the person receiving them, and all are examples of an overarching philosophy of giving and service that we can each apply in our lives every day. Simply by thinking about something other than ourselves, and by monitoring our behaviors with a pure and selfless intent of making the lives of other people better, we have the privileged opportunity to change them for the better. This is what being a Gift Giver is all about.
Whether we acknowledge it or not, we all have a debt to the society we live in. If we want to succeed in society at anything, we must first pay our debt to society. But here is the most important part; our debt never ends. We must pay it each and every day for the rest of our lives. Once you realize this, no matter your philosophical, or religious framework, whether it be the golden rule of Christianity, the humanist view of biochemical inducement of self-preservation through the sociological laws of reciprocity, the Mystical Law of Karma (the universal law of ethical causation), Confucian Shu reciprocity, good old horse sense of the law of the harvest, or any other world-view construct of the same truth, life will start working for you rather than against you. Life has a way of shining on people who stand in the sunshine of kind actions. But you can't fake it. It has to come from the heart, with a true spirit of giving and selflessness. A talent is no talent, unless it is used for the benefit of other people. Even if you consider your talents a blessing, they will be quickly used against you in a Newtonian reversal if you do not properly use your precious gifts for the benefit of others. For a brief period in this ephemeral existence, we have the privilege to share time with other people, and serve them, and their needs. The greatest joys in life are found not only in what we do and feel, but also in our quiet hopes and labors for others. I have written before, that as with people, the trees that are pruned, watered and nurtured by caring hands bear the greatest fruits. It is critical to know that it works both ways. If you personally have not been served by caring hands in your own life, do not be bitter, but instead, ask yourself who you can now serve. If you have had some tough times in life, now more than ever is the time to make someone else's life better. How we treat other people can, and does change them, and how we treat others is in fact part of how treat ourselves, which changes us. To me a person is defined by their actions. And being social creatures, outside of our own useless self-image, the only proof that we exist resides in the minds of other people we change with our actions. So, ask yourself, How do I change people? I want to change people for the better, and I want to have my existence proved by the raised hands of the people I have met, who will say without doubt that I have cared.
Where wise actions are the fruit of life, wise discourse is the pollination. But this message is only talk. To be of value to us all, these ideas need to be made real in the world. We should speak to protect the ideals of goodness, and act to make them real in the world. The first proves a consummate mind, the second a valorous heart. It is my belief that true progress for humanity is anything that takes us closer to loving one another. Small acts of kindness between you and the individuals around you are are the germination that spring into being something as mysterious as life itself, and what may in fact be man's greatest accomplishment; compassion for others. It is my hope that we can all grow in one another a deeper and more meaningful desire to ease the burdens others. Every person is a precious gift, and we are all like little children who yearn for acceptance, safety, unconditional love and the gentle-warm affection that can only come from another soul who is whole enough, and generous enough to reach out, and give the gift of acceptance and compassion. I would like to be such a person, and am therefore reaching out with a hope that I could bring some degree of happiness to other human beings.
Many people are now sensing that something important is happening in the world. People are talking, and they "feel" something; they are picking up on something they cannot articulate, but they know it is there. Let's define it before it gets here. Please join me and other good-spirited people around the world in our deepest and most sincere desire to share our own unique gifts. Become a Gift Giver, and set into motion a life of service, with other caring people, who will leave in the wake of their good deeds the waves of promise, and hope that will cover the vast waters of any shallow doubt. We carry within us the enormity of possibility that has created everything man has made in the world. Let us now yearn for the possibility of building a happiness in every heart. Let us now build inward, a new world of hope, where our greatest achievements are counted as the the simple acts that reap heartfelt tears from the people who have touched, and been touched by the caring hands of other people bearing precious gifts.
Thank you,
Bryant McGill
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