How I even got any sleep last night is beyond me. Too many things going on at once and what gets me is that when everyone thinks that I am so level headed (this is when I need my best buddy Bill to calm me down) they don't realize that I'm lost in my own little world at times. There are SO MANY things I want in life that I have yet to see happen. I wanted so much to have a child, but so far no luck. I dealt with that and faced it the way I was supposed to. If I got upset over it in the beginning I finally learned that maybe I am luckier than I thought. My parents were blessed with three grandchildren (thanks to my brother) and I know that is the most important thing. They have grandchildren that are loved and pretty much missed.
But back to this blog. I normally try to be open about myself like what I dream about for my future, and you have to understand that I never expected to really be able to find someone who would essentially love me for myself. I think that's why things have a way of happening sometimes for the right/best reasons. Maybe there is more to me than I though but even I have to realize what it is. So if you want to know the real me, let me know. Don't expect some fantsay because I am no fantasy or beauty.
