It’s true. I am not a housewife. Nor do I ever want that title. To be more exact I find it is most definitely a full time job, one which I don’t particularly recall ever applying for. It seems to me there are two kinds of women. The kind that never needs training at this job, and the type no matter how hard they train, it seems they always fall just a little short. I am one of the latter.
Last night before bed I could have sworn I put the whites into the dryer. This morning I wake up to dirty dishes and the darks in the dryer, my significant other desperately looking for clean socks. I casually say, “Honey, there’s socks in the dryer.” Of course however, to my dismay there are not socks in the dryer. So of course between scrambling the cheese omelet, reheating yesterday’s leftover coffee and trying not to burn toast I rush to put socks into the dryer that I could have sworn already had socks in it.
Meanwhile- I’m trying desperately not to climb into a cocoon of self loathing for the fact I suck- horribly- at this job. In fact- I would fire myself from it if I could.
Now, understand, I have always tried not to do anything half assed in my life, housework is one of those things. I have always tended to pride myself on keeping a relatively clean house even when I was working two full time jobs and in a band. Now- my house is my job and yet I fail miserably at every breath it seems.
This is the merging of two lives. A laundry pile that is never done, dishes that are never “all” clean, trash that always has to go out- and in the midst you try to get the pat on the back and thank you for managing to cook food that is edible.
Food, being the one thing, I am actually rather good at. So, should I remain happy that of my life I can do 1 of the house-Girlfriend things right or should I hire out for training?
The real disturbing part of all of it for me, is to a limit I actually enjoy the domestic thing, what ruins it, is that I suck at it.
I think the point of all this being is that however much I might want to be the natural woman with the gene of home and hearth, is the brutal reality that it skipped me. I just don’t have that gene. Perhaps its being single too long, perhaps it’s a subconscious stubbornness, perhaps it may even just be I never had a role model myself to instill that in me. The truth, since trying to actually be this person I fall short of, I do strive harder and promise I’ll get better at it, but honestly- I am just not this girl.
I have learned definitely, that people highly underestimate and under appreciate the everyday housewife or for that matter single moms who do it all. I’m not a single mom I’m not a mom at all… but I cannot imagine how hard that would be if you are like me, horrible at being domestic.
The upside to all of this, I do have a relatively happy man, even if he doesn’t have clean socks sometimes (maybe if he had more than 3 pairs at my house…) and I’m cute enough to get away with my other wise slacking talents in the home.
