One day in the future, OJ Simpson has a heart-attack
and dies.
He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him.
"I don't know what to do here," says the devil.
"You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You
definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you
what I'm going to do. I've got a couple of folks
here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one
of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll
even let YOU decide who leaves."
OJ thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil
opened the door to the first room. In it was Ted
Kennedy and a large pool of water. Ted kept diving
in, and surfacing, empty handed. Over, and over, and
over he dove in and surfaced with nothing. Such was
his fate in hell.
"No," OJ said. "I don't thin k so. I'm not a good
swimmer, and I don't think I could do that all day
long."
The devil led him to the door of the next room. In
it was Al Gore with a sledgehammer and a room full
of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after
time after time.
"No, this is no good; I've got this problem with my
shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I
could do was break rocks all day, "commented OJ.
The devil opened a third door. Through it, OJ saw
Bill Clinton, lying on the bed, his arms tied over
his head, and his legs restrained in a spread-eagle
pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what
she does best. OJ looked at this in shocked disbelief,
and finally said, "Yeah man, I can handle this."
The devil smiled and said .. . . . .
(This is priceless)
"OK, Monica, you're free to go."