NuevaJess's blog: "NuevaJess Poems"

LITTLE BRO

Where did the time go?

Little bro

I see you rushing headlong to grow up ASAP

Just like me

But I had no partner in crime until you came into my world

I was 23 when you came to be

Both of us wishing the age gap was only a skip instead of a jump

You were my monkey, you were my friend, you were someone upon whom I could always depend

Did I choke you little bro?

With the tentacles of overprotection

Going from making you feel secure to inwardly screaming for a way out

Whatever you do, stay you and stay true

Remember I said you could be anyone and do anything no matter what the world said

Remember too that I always included myself in that group

Practice makes perfect were your sister’s often repeated coaching words that she also needed to hear

It is always the striving that mattered for you know through words and deeds that no one is perfect, especially not me

I was witness to your light, your fire, your truly unique exuberant nature

But speaking of fire

I must acknowledge this

I will humbly do penance for any and all grievances you suffered because of me

Due to my own failures, insecurities, frailties, and misjudgments

Did I break my own rules?

You know you could call me a fool

Open eyes, open mind, open heart and open arms will always be there for you

Even when I fall short you are my cohort of choice

Choices

Always telling you that you have them, we all do

Did I forget to mention they weren’t always easy?

Someday, and it will come real soon

You will take all that you have received

The good, the bad, and the ugly

And become the man you want to be

The setbacks, the hurts along with the triumphs will make you stronger

And you will be so much wiser than your big sis

I look up to you now and not just in height

For you are poised to take the grandest flight

So whatever our faults, we have shared many more joys

Your big heart, your warm smile and your dogged determination

Have had you surmount educational obstacles with the grace of your many victorious spectacles only a beast sk8r could master

You and I are worlds apart but in my eyes we’ll always be close at heart

If you think I come down too hard, you may be right, but I never meant any slight

Recall my pleas to you that I need kicks in the ass too

Forgive me if in my clouded turbulent life I did not see your agony and strife

The habit of me always reaching out and crumbling inwards when no one came forward

Making me blind to where I stumbled and upon whom I tripped over, but

Nothing and no one, not me, not you

Can stop me from loving you, being so very proud of you

I’ll still be here, but not in your face, knowing you can succeed in any time and place

You are my teacher, my confidant, my little bro

And so it is with deepest love that I let you go

But no, not where it counts, you will never be far from me

Once upon a time there was a big sister and a little brother

And ever after she would love him like no other.