For 3 years now, I have lived in misery. Misery from the lose of my 3 1/2 y/o son who died of cancer. Sometimes it is really hard to even get up in the mornings, knowing that he isn't here to say good morning or I love you. I have to keep telling myself, that one day, I will be with him, it's just taking time. I have tried to have another child, but I guess the "thing" just isn't there with me anymore. Now don't get me wrong, I love to have sex with my husband, but the urge to have another child is gone. Yes I would love to have another child, only if I knew deep down in my heart that he/she would live past 3 1/2 years of age. But I know that there would be no way for that. Cancer took one child of mine, I don't want to have another taken away like that. It would kill me. Hell losing the first almost did it, so I know that the 2nd one would deffy put me in my grave(or urn for that matter).
3 years ago today at 7:37 am in Las Vegas, my son took his last breath to cancer.
