Well, I've begun to wonder WTF is wrong with either me or everyone else in the world... I've been quite anti-social recently, as i'm sure you've all noticed... I haven't been talking to anyone, and i'm terribly sorry for that. I've been major stressed... shit just keeps fucking up in my life... like one thing right after another... and in the mean time i have been trying to get things settled... like, my home, my life, my kids, etc... and during all of this i've not been able to keep in very close contact with anyone... and apparently thats pissed some ppl off... MAJOR... like, i've tried explaining that shit has just been rough on me recently, and i get this shit story how i only care about myself and all this other bullshit... yet ALL of my stress is cuz i'm trying to get things settled for my girls.... so, like, NO i ONLY care about my kids.... i've not even been doing anything for ME.... so it's just bullshit... I've gotten so sick of ppl getting an attitude with me cuz they don't like how i'm doing something and expecting me to be all nice when they bitch at me, or get sarcastic with me, or what ever... it's like, WOW>.. why not approach shit from the "long time no talk how ya been" thing... not "YOU NEVER TALK TO ME, YOU DON'T CARE, ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS YOU" WTF?!?!? Like i am going to even give a flying fuck about you when you say shit like that to me?!?!?! Right now, i don't have my own home... cuz of some stupid bullshit that went down w/ my friend i was living with.... which means my kids are in a MAJOR uproar.... i've been stressed as fuck, and trying to get things sorted out, so in the meatime i update everyone by doing blogs.... but FUCK if everyone doesn't get a personalized email from me, when i'm obviously UPSET AS FUCK.... they get pissed.... i mean, really... WTF?!?!? sobecause of all of that, i've lost another person from my life, that i cared for very much... but i can't stress about losing ppl right now... i'll worry about that when i'm not dealing with all this other shit... my kids come first in my life, and right now, i can't deal with much else... when you don't have kids you don't get how hard things can be... and i'm depressed, I'm stressed, and i'm not doing too well... and thanks a lot of understanding... FUCKERS.... frankly, i put my kids first, if you have an issue with that, kiss my ass and leave me the fuck alone, i don't need your bitchy whiny poor me bullshittin ass... i have more important things to worry about.... for those of you who've been understanding and stuff with me through all of this, thanks... i know it's been rough, and you've felt neglected... but just know it's cuz i'm trying to not only WORK crazy ass hours, but keep my kids happy and comfortable as possible.... just the other day tash was crying cuz "she doesn't have her own home"... i'm staying with my step mom right now, which is "home" but tash doesn't have her own room, her own toys, etc... so it's been tough on her, and as you can imagine, this is breaking my heart... right now i'm honestly not sure how to deal with any of this... i'm stressed beyond belief and have no one to talk to about this... everyone's being pissy as fuck cuz i've been ignoring them... bitches... but i know many of you have been hella understanding as to my absence, thanks so much... right now more than anything i just need patience and understanding... you guys know i love ya!!! I wouldn't have shit with out my friends.... email me, please, let me know how life is, and i'll reply asap....
