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pain is all i ever felt in my life hurt is all i know tears is all i cry . smile i never knew how to laugh how to smile and or how to love i was never taught those things i was taught to never be happy never speak my mind never stand up for my self i was taught i said something wrong i got beat and thats all i have ever know is pain and hurt . when i was younger everything i did was wrong to my parents my sister and who i was with at the time i spoke something they didnt like i got yelled at or hit i went some were i shouldnt have gone i got yelled at or hit . it seemed like nothing i did was right in there eyes or in there minds i still feel like i have to watch what i do and what i say so i dont get hurt or yelled at again i hide in my shell like a turtle to protect myself from harm . harm from men harm from family and most of all harm from myself iam tired of having to shelid myself hope one day as i grow older i can take my guard down and not be so afraid and not be in so much pain just a little insite to why iam the way iam
some of my old writtings i found
