The Most Functional Word is....
Well, it's shit........That's right, shit!
Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.
Consider:
You can be shit faced, shit out of luck, or have shit for brains.
With a little effort, you can get your shit together, find a place for your shit or decide to shit or get off the pot.
You can smoke shit,
Buy shit,
Sell shit,
Lose shit,
Find shit,
Forget shit,
And tell others to eat shit and die.
Some people know their shit, while others
Can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.
There are lucky shits,
Dumb shits,
Crazy shits
And sweet shits.
There is bull shit,
Horse shit and
Chicken shit.
You can throw shit,
Sling shit,
Catch shit,
Shoot shit,
Or duck when shit hits the fan.
You can give a shit or
Serve shit on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep shit
Or be happier than a pig in shit.
Some days are colder than shit,
Some days are hotter than shit,
And some days are just plain shitty.
Some music sounds like shit,
Things can look like shit,
And there are times when you feel like shit.
You can have too much shit,
Not enough shit,
The right shit,
The wrong shit or
A lot of weird shit.
You can carry shit,
Have a mountain of shit,
Or find yourself up a shit creek without a paddle.
Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit
And other times you fall in a bucket of shit
And come out smelling like a rose.
When you stop to consider all the facts,
it's the basic building block of creation.
And remember, once you know your shit,
You don't need to know anything else!
