MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME TIME TRAVEL
"if you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME LOGIC
"Because I said so that's why"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME IRONY
"Keep crying and I will give you some thing to cry about!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT CONTORTIONISM
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME STAMINA
"You'll sit there till all that spinach's gone!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ANTICIPATION
"Just wait till we get home!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME MY HERITAGE
"Close that door. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME WISDOM
"When you get to my age you'll understand!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT HYPOCRISY
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME OPTHAMALOGY
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes they're going to get stuck that way!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT TRACK MEETS
"If the lawnmower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT JUSTICE
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT STATESMANSHIP
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside!"
