#1...Can you cry under water?
#2...How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
#3...Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
#4...Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a penny for your thoughts?" Where's that extra penny going to?
#5...Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
#6...How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
#7...Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
#8...Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
#9...Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
#10...Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
#11...If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
#12...Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
#13...Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out!"
#14...Or watch a white thing come out of a chicken's behind and think, "that ought to taste good."
#15...Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
#16...If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
#17...Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
#18...Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
#19...Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
#20...Why did you just try singing the two songs above? #21...Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
#22...Where does the other sock go to?
#23...Is the glass half empty or half full?
#24...Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?
#25...Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
#26...Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
#27...Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
#28...Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
#29...Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
#30...Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
#31...Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
#32...If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
#33...Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white?
#34...Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
#35...Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
#36...Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
#37...Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you try first?
#38...How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
#39...When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"
#40...Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
#41...In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat? #42...The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
#43...Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
#44...If you can't drink and drive, why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?
#45...Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
#46...Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it is called cargo?
#47...Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
#48...Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?
#49...Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?
#50...Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?
#51...How can someone "draw a blank"?
#52...If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?
#53...Why do 'tug' boats push their barges?
#54...Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?
#55...Why does one get in trouble for WRECKless driving?
#56...Does a fish get cramps after eating?
#57...Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
#58... Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"? Shouldn't it be called a "near hit"?
#59...When they ship polystyrene, what do they pack it in?
#60...How do you KNOW it's new and improved dog food?
#61...Why is it called rush hour when everything moves so slowly?