Today, as a direct result of trust, I have lost faith in the human race once again, (and probably for good).
I have tried to work hard all my life, only to continue to be knocked down each time that I get a little ahead. In all my years, I have never achieved anything that I have wanted. i have never attained the only one true thing that I have desired...a family.
If no one hears from me for quite awhile, it is because today's society and it's ways are forcing me to go "underground" once more. To totally disappear from the face of the earth until such a time as I have been properly healed from the deep wounds I have incurred over this century.
"...And the dragon slumbered, not knowing the evil ways of mankind, but hearing with eternal ears from under the earth."
The horrors that I have seen, and the losses that I have had in the past are trying the patience of this old ugly dragon once more. I continue to feel the loss of my princess, Carrie more and more each and every day. She was my life, my world, my universe, and my heaven.
This old world harbors the actual old-world demon, and that is ME. I am the Unnameable. The Unspeakable. The one no one dares to mention. I am the black-sheep, the fallen, the sullen...but I am who I am, and I am immortal. I have seen the horrors of the ages, the brutality of brother against brother in war, the stench of Death as it took everyone that I have ever loved.
I have no love to give any longer. No compassion for this strange old earth and its inhabitants. My life will be led by the awaiting of the eventual death of my past, the death of my memories, the death of ME.
If and when my time finally does arrive to this old body, you will remember me. Each time the wind blows, my name will carry the tides. Each time the sun shines, my face will light your way. Each time it rains, my tears will wash away the evil and the wrong from this world......
