I was reading a friend's blog earlier and find myself relating to it in ways I'd rather not. I've looked back on my life and seen that there are so many things i wanted to accomplish and haven't at this point. I'm 22 years old and when I see friends all around me graduating from college it makes me realize how badly I let my life slip through my fingers. I hear from family members how I don't shape up whether it be physically, financially, emotionally or otherwise. Basically I've become a screw up in every way that counts to them.
Alot of people know that I fell off the track that I had set for my life when my mom passed away. At 16 I lost sight of what I wanted to accomplish and since then haven't worked really hard to get it back because I realize it never really meant anything to me.
People I know with alot more heart to succeed and become something have failed so what made me think I ever could. I used to think I was smart and capable of anything, until life tore out my heart and left me to pick up the pieces. Now I just think I'm a failure.