Rules of Minnesota :
1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.
2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel
road." I drive a Pickup truck because I want to. No
matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust
on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
3. They are cattle & fishing lakes. That's what they
smell like to you. They smell like money to us. Get
over it.
4. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have
$250,000 combines that are driven only 3 times a year.
5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called
being friendly. Try to understand the concept.
6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of ducks are
coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand You
better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the
time.
7 Yeah, we eat walleye & pike and love it. You really
want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait
shop.
8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer
season. It's a Religious holiday held the closest
Saturday to the first of November.
9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all
women, regardless of age.
10. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu.
Order steak. Or you can order the Chef's Salad and
pick off the pound of ham & turkey.
11. When we fill out a table, there are three main
dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three
spices: Onion, Pepper, and Garlic! Oh, yeah... We
don't care what you folks in Cincinnati call that
stuff you eat... It ain't real lutefisk. And real
lutefisk never met a tomato!
12. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be
brown, wet, and served over ice. You bring "Mary
Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to
shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
13. College and High School Football is as important
here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a hell of a lot
more fun to watch.
14. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the
water hazards --it spooks the fish.
15. Colleges? Try Minnesota Tech, U of M, MU or MSU.
They come outta there with an education plus a love
for God and country, and they still wave at passing
pickups when they come for the holidays.
16. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force,
and Marines, than any other state, so "Don't screw
with Minnesota," If you do, you will get whipped by
the best.
17. Always remember what a great mind once said:"The
United States wouldn't be what it is today if it had
not been for Minnesota !" Minnesota is the greatest
state ever!! If you are from Minnesota and you do not
forward this to all your friends in 10 min. You are
not a true Minnesotan !!!!!!
The fish are biting.
CATCH YA LATER........
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