Who do you thank
when finally something starts
to go your way,
and you’re so used to things being fucked up
that it takes you totally by surprise?
And can I complain to them
for not being there
for what seems like 99%
of the rest of my life?
Just who are you, Fate?
A concept?
An organization?
An idea?
Show yourself.
Or is it God?
Or a God.
A God that is in charge of a list
that I happen to be on.
Like a waiter’s station of tables
that I happen to be sitting at.
I’ve looked at this menu
and you always say the same thing,
“Out of that.”
No tip for you.
Not this time
Not this life
Or is it Karma?
What goes around
comes around.
You only get what you give
Some days you eat the bear;
some days the bear eats you.
You’re a sanctimonious one,
Karma.
Or is it myself?
I only have
myself to blame
for all the bad
negative
destructive thoughts
that bleed into my daily life.
You made your bed
Now lie in it
Taking responsibility
has never been
a strong suit of mine.
With goals written down,
promises made,
and lies kept at bay ...
I will only have
myself to thank
when I make it
to you someday.