I know this doesn't get read by many people but i just want to say this;
sometimes i wish that i could be in love with someone who i know i want to spend the rest of my life with and who will make me undeniably happy but those make for high standards but damn it why cant i finally be allowed to smile for once? That is all that i ask for. Someone who will not run out on me or treat me without any form of respect or regards for how i feel. Someone who will be there for me and vise verse? I am so sick if being sent packing or finding a person only to realise they are not the one. Its like my whole life has been nothing but disappointments and regrets.
You think you have finally found the person you were looking for only to spend time with them and learn that it had all been wasted. I will say that i have matured alot over the years and have come to realise the person that i want to spend time with and what i want in that final relationship. I am just afraid that like the rest of my life it will never happen and i will end up alone once more.
Even now i am in a relationship that i no longer want to be in. My heart has been wrung out and hung to dry once again and all i feel anymore is alone and emotionless. Honestly im tired emotionally and mentally and want this all to end so i can smile and laugh once more but i can't...im stuck in a cell that i cant get out of like a caged 'animal'.
If only i could be saved once and for all!
