Ragdoll's blog: "good stuff"

 In as much..........Matthew Ch 25 vs 31-40 31

"When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. 32All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. 34"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.' 37"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?' 40"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me

.' *******************************************************************************************************

 Even in my pain and in sickness. I run the gamut of emotions.

 I want to hate and lash out. I want certain people to feel my pain 10 fold over...

 I want them to be betrayed like they have betrayed me....

I then fall asleep...and words from my years of studies come back as a still whisper into my heart.... "In as Much....................."

And my bitterness breaks. I cant hate.

 I wasnt designed for hate.

 I was made for Love

 Showing it, needing it, giving it, Recieving it, Living it.

 I want to be the Vessels Of Mercy

 A tender touch A guiding beacon in a dark world

I cant reach out.. if my hands are tainted with blood of hate and unforgiveness.

 I am blocked and shut down and of no use to the world...

 If I am a hypocrite....

 I cannot be that...

 My soul cries..please release me from this pain..

 The pain of one man's betrayal of my heart with another woman's body... on my birthday of all days

 Give me strength to give him to You and never look back.......

 Let me have my freedom to find true and pure love that will not leave me or hurt me

 But if that is not to be... Then please open my heart to love the whole world...

 And do so much good...........

In as much.....This is what I wish to do....

 ~Ragdoll~